KimI’ve felt scattered recently. I’m overscheduled again.
Part of this is having a kid who is a dedicated athlete who can’t drive yet and needs me to take him to practice and tournaments. Part of this is having another kid with a chronic illness who has recently left for college and is transitioning from mom/pediatrician healthcare to self/grown-up doctor healthcare. The transition has been messy. For some reason he’s been having trouble scheduling the infusions he needs every eight weeks. I have intervened to keep him on the right track. At some point, this will calm down. But right now, it’s frustrating and time consuming. The good news? Both kids are happy on their chosen paths. And I’m happy to see them thriving.
When I’m feeling overwhelmed, I like to take a step back to examine the cause. To cross things off my list. Or intentionally add to it.
Healthy, Happy, or Wealthy
Because the Tik Tok algorithm is all knowing, I recently came across a post from a woman who is also feeling unbalanced. She focused on three goals. If something doesn’t fit into those goals, they are a hard no. I tried to find this Tik Tok again, to share it with you, and of course it’s lost to the ether.
My three goals are Happy, Healthy or Wealthy. If something on my list doesn’t contribute to my happiness (connecting with good friends, reading, going to a movie, taking a long walk), my health (working out, taking vitamins, getting a massage) or my wealth (working, side-hustle, writing), then I’m not doing them anymore.
This seems basic, doesn’t it? Of course you shouldn’t do things that don’t serve you. But as a people pleaser, I have a hard time with this concept. I will say yes to things because I know it’s good for the other person. Because it’s not exactly what I want but it could be fun. Because I feel the obligation to give of myself. But the more I give of myself, the less I have for me in the end. And why aren’t I serving myself first instead of clamoring for leftovers?
What I’m Writing
My goal for November is to find some Beta readers for my third novel. While the first two novels were standalone stories bound together by a common trope, this latest rough draft is the first in a series of three. I’m writing the second book in the series now. The first in the series is written, but not published yet, because I’m trying to thread the storyline through all three books. And I’ve been making changes to the first one as I write the second. It’s my first true series and I’m working through consistency, and fear of not getting it right.
I’m also at that part in the plot that I’m unsure about. I find if I have trouble moving through Act II, it often means I need to go back to Act I and add rev the story up. Give it more action, add motivation for the characters to move forward.
What I’m Reading
Sunrise on the Reaping by Suzanne Collins. I have to admit I’m not as into it as I was with Katniss’s storyline. But it’s Suzane Collins. And my devotion to her runs deep.
Onyx Storm by Rebecca Yarros. This one is taking a while because I am listening to it on audiobook through the Libby app and I’m competing with about 5,000 other borrowers as well. I’m currently 3rd in line for it.
I’d like to pick up Heart the Lover by Lily King. I read Writers & Lovers a few years ago and loved it. And I’m excited for this one. I’m #3 on the waitlist at the public library. I’m trying to support the library more these days so it will be worth the wait.
What I’m Watching
Two plays at the local university have my attention this month. One is called Dracula, A Feminist Revenge Fantasy, Really, which is unfortunately sold out. And the other is Sweeney Tood, which I’ve never seen live.
My husband and I are making our way through the end of the Buffy and Angel series. It’s our second time watching these. And we both love them.
My son and I are doing another re-watch of Stranger Things before the new season comes out later this month. He’s obsessed. I don’t mind it because the writing is so good. The story unfolds through different characters responsible for separate but linked tasks that lead to a successful ending. Love the way it’s so tightly woven.
I’m re-watching Gilmore Girls again. Because it’s fall. And it’s my comfort show. And Lorelie Gilmore is my spirit animal. Though, as I’m getting older, I find that sometimes Emily is, in fact, more relatable. Something to ponder in my journal.
On YouTube, I’m following Sarra Cannon’s Rough Draft Diaries. It’s good to wrap yourself in community sometimes.